People Keep Asking Me Questions

SMC Announces Dividend
http://oneear.blogspot.com/2006/09/rue-looks-to-cash-in-on-sudden.html

In an effort to bolster sluggish stock sales in Send Me Cash.com, which are lagging far behind expectations, Chief Chief OneEar has announced that the company will pay investors a 15% dividend this year. For each dollar invested, the company will send back 15 cents. “Come on, guys,” says Ear, “Where else are you going to get a 15% return?”

Ear hopes that the dividend will excite lazy, good-for-nothing dot.com investors who, thus far, have shunned the fledgling company. “Does Microsoft offer a 15% dividend,” queried OneEar, “No!” “We’ve got triple digit growth, a double digit dividend, we’re young, we’re hip, we’re a dot.com…. come on guys…. .please?”

SMC’s announcement brought mixed results from Wall Street. “Who did what now?” said one leading analyst.

OneEar maintains his optimism. “Look, we’re not a Wall Street company, we’re a Main Street company. We’re not casual Friday, we’re casual everyday. We’re not top down, we’re bottoms up. You ask WHY they should send me their cash, I ask, HOW they should send me their cash.”

Ear seemed defensive when asked whether SMC actually does anything. “Does anybody really DO anything?” “Look,” continued OneEar, “You give me $1,000.00 and I will send you $150.00. Then, you only need to work for another $850.00 in order to give me another $1,000.00, at which time I’ll give you $150.00. Now, you have made $300.00, I’ve made $1,700.00 and together we have made $2,000.00 total out of your $1,850 investment. This is what is called “creating wealth.” Now, SendMeCash. What more can I say?”