On Weeee Updated - Congratulations

Our friend Alceste has just completed his PhD! Sincere congratulations to you, sir. You are now, without a doubt, the most highly educated drummer in the Clown Squad.

You are hereby officially forgiven for and absolved of all sins to date including but not limited to your troubling absence from Churck services. However, now that you have disposed of your dissertation, we expect you to become more regular.
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My Toast to You

We are gathered here today to honor a real man – but not just any man. This man is a father, a son, a brother, and an uncle, and a brother-in-law, and a taxpayer. And he is a friend. He is all that a man can, nay should, no MUST be. He is a man’s man.

I will never forget the first time that I met {insert name} . I was immediately struck by his sincerity, his genuineness, his authenticity, and his realness. Over time, I came to know {insert name} not just as a real man, but also as a (make quotation marks in air) “real” man. Yes, he is both real and (make quotation marks in air) “real.”

And so, on this special occasion, we raise our glasses, both figuratively and metaphorically, and we give a toast, “This one’s for you {insert name}, for being one of the really real men.

(Cue: For He's a Jolly Good Fellow - to the tune of The Bear Went Over the Mountain)