Saturday, November 03, 2007

Pacific Tectonic Plate on the Move Again!!

Last Tuesday, the Pacific Plate took up the baton in it's eons-old race against the North American plate. This caused homes in the San Francisco area to rattle. As a recent immigrant to the San Andreas fault, I have put some water aside and done some thinking about earthquakes and why I could do without them. I feel, therefore, basically as prepared as the local veterans. And the Legionnaires.
My biggest fear in all of this is that "the Big One" is going to occur at the precise moment that I am conducting my own morning ritual of making my "Big One".

I will not be able to grab water, drink it as fast as I can until it is gone, get under a doorframe and do all the interpretive dance moves recommended by FEMA if my colon is, how shall we say, "in motion". That is a relatively unstoppable, uninterruptable event, even if the earth moves below me. Now, were I the offspring of Alceste, the opportunity to streak across my apartment, half-naked with feces smeared all over my little body would probably carry a certain amount of defiant appeal. I have no such luck, unfortunately.

Maybe that Satan-exposer can help me with some sort of advice like his explanation of witches symbolized riding broomsticks so it would look like they had weiners and the crops would grow. That guy seems to be full of knowledge. But how in the hex did he get a "dot org" website with all that goobledy-gook? Any other takers?


Litzi said...

Hi Doc Bok,
In case you missed the news, two earthquakes with magnitudes of over 2.0 struck the San Jose region today within nine hours of each other. The epicenters were located about five miles east of Alum Rock. Both occurred along the Calaveras Fault, where the 5.6 magnitude earthquake struck Tuesday, October 30th. So it’s not only the San Andreas Fault that we Mexifornians should be concerned with. If the “Big One” doesn’t crack us off into little islands bobbing around in the Pacific, the imminent fires will burn us up into Brick-Ettes. It’s any wonder we’re all a little wacky out here in the Land of Fruits and Nuts.

OneEar said...

Your quake-a-crap-a-phobia is overblown. You should be fearing mud-slides and the rising ocean. Imagine that while on the crapper.

Doc Bok said...

That's a very good point, OE. Litzi scared the crap out of me, again. Your vision is more soothing.

Litzi said...

Hi Doc Bok,
If you want something else to concern yourself with about living in California, consider that there are SIX potentially active volcanoes: Mount Lassen, Mount Shasta, Medicine Lake, Clear Lake, Long Valley and Coso. Something else to ponder the next time you’re on the crapper.