Sunday, May 13, 2007

Temptation and "Dark" human emotions found to be the clear result of aliens



Welp, the latest Spiderman movie has hit the screets, and I'll be honest: I liked it. I guess the secret is to talk to a few people who hated it first (with any movie), and then promptly go before you start realizing the fickleness of the haters' sense of taste. With that fresh sense of "this movie is going to be yet another expensive, over-promoted Hollywood piece of crap, with no redeeming qualities whatsoever, but let's face it, I'm single and I can walk to the Fox Movie theater anytime I want", you can actually be pleasantly surprised by any form of quality that happens to show up on the screen, whether it was intentional or not.

The basic premise of the movie, aside from the requisite but nevertheless cool action scenes, was that Our Hero (Spiderman) has weaknesses. Try Kryptonite--except black, alive, but also from an alien planet. Again. His weaknesses actually make him act like a dick, but in a cool way. I think 4 out of 5 dentists would prefer the black-suited Spiderman for his cockiosity. I know I did.

But then, Eric Forman shows up. Crap. And no Fez. And no hot red-headed chick from next door, unless you want to count the movie's heroine, "MJ" as a hot red-headed chick from next door to Peter Parker. Ok, so I guess there WAS a hot red-headed chick from next door, now that I think of it. Well, at least no one was from Wisconsin. Thank God, also, that no one wanted to put Ashton Kutcher anywhere in the movie.

Die-hard Marvel Comics fans will be pleased to see that Stan Lee makes a cameo appearance as a "man on the screet", and is instantly recognizable by his horribly-lopsided post-plastic surgery hairline. Oh, well. It is the price Los Angeleans pay for a thick fur coat to impress the chicks.

So, in summary, if you expect little to nothing from this movie, you should enjoy it. And the high-tech jet-skateboard scenes from the "I'm bad I'm good I'm bad I'm your friend I stole your girlfriend I'm dead" Green Goblin Junior are actually pretty cool.

1 comment:

OneEar said...

I really wish you hadn't given away all of the movie's secrets with your in-depth analysis. Now I don't feel compelled to not see it.

The last movie I watched in the theater was March of the Penguins (unless you count the IMAX film about excuses to put cameras in airplanes, oh, and Over the Hedge, but that wasn't really a movie and I couldn't really watch it). Spoiler: the seal eats a penguin.