Sunday, December 31, 2006

Conspiracy?


So, am I the only one who has noticed a certain commonality among James Brown, Gerald Ford, and Saddam Hussein? Before you sleeping sheep answer 'yes, dumbass', think about it: Did you think about it? Ok, good.
Now, how about both OneEar and myself being coincidentally named Time Magazine's "Man (sheep, goat) of the Year, 2006"? Still believe in your convenient serendipity? Think about it.
Have you ever considered how inconvenient Al Gore is?
It just keeps piling up and up, people. Open your eyes, for goodness' sake!
Not convinced?
Well, try this one on for size:
Have any of you Einsteins ever picked up on anything funnily familiar between the Incredible Hulk and the Grinch? Well?!?

Hello? Hello? How about skin color, for starters? And perhaps, cranky disposition? Do you people think this stuff is all accidental? You really expect me to believe there is no connection between Dr. Seuss and Dr. David Banner's illicit experimentation with gamma-wave radiation? They have the same title, for God's sake!! Come on. Somebody help me out here. How about you, Man of the Year?

4 comments:

OneEar said...

I see you've begun celebrating early. Good for you.

I've learned about some shocking "coincidences" involving Presidents Lincoln and Kennedy. Lincoln freed the slaves while Kennedy was the son of a crime syndicator. Lincoln was a Republican while Kennedy was a Democrat. And Lincoln was shot at Ford theatre while Ford just died of old age.

You really do have to wonder.

Miss Litzi said...

Hi Loud But Off Key,
That’s an extremely fetching caricature of the “inventor of the Internet”. I always thought there was something a bit “off” about him. You and OneEar and every other person with the right plumbing were selected by Time Magazine as “Man of the Year, 2006”. This wasn’t any coincidence; obviously the editors swing a certain way and wanted to guarantee that all the “guys” were on their team. One thing that always struck me as odd about “the Incredible Hulk” was that when he burst out of all his clothes, he never lost his pants; how moronic and unrealistic was that? Maybe that explains why he was “cranky”; his extra tight trousers were making him sing soprano. Or he wanted to play with Al Gore, who was too preoccupied trying to close the hole in the ozone layer.

Happy New Year to all three of you!

OneEar said...

ML - I see that you count yourself among those who wondered just how big the Hulk's giganticized reproductive organ would be. Obviously, in reality, it ripped right through his pants. However, because the show was on prime time, they had to edit that out and to insert a stunt double with a more TV-friendly crotch. That man, who later became a star on the hit cross-dressing show "Bosom Buddies," was Tom Hanks.

You can read all about it in my forthcoming expose, Tom Hanks and the Hulk's Incredibly Massive Green Crank.

Miss Litzi said...

Hi OneEar,
Oops! I’ve been “outed”, but surely I’m not the sole person who wondered about the trouser situation, am I?? It’s surprising that Tom Hanks doesn’t list being a stunt double for either Bill Bixby or Lou Ferringo among his acting credits. Perhaps his career was just taking off in 1977 and he settled for the role just to get on the “silver screen”.

I’m looking forward to your expose about The Incredible Hulk’s massive green crank; will it have illustrations and photographs as well as a scathing text?

I hope 2007 will be a good year for you.