Tuesday, November 11, 2008

He Was Hungry You F^cking Tree

Matthew 21 (King James Version);

18Now in the morning as he returned into the city, he hungered.

19And when he saw a fig tree in the way, he came to it, and found nothing thereon, but leaves only, and said unto it, Let no fruit grow on thee henceforward for ever. And presently the fig tree withered away.

20And when the disciples saw it, they marvelled, saying, How soon is the fig tree withered away!

21Jesus answered and said unto them, Verily I say unto you, If ye have faith, and doubt not, ye shall not only do this which is done to the fig tree, but also if ye shall say unto this mountain, Be thou removed, and be thou cast into the sea; it shall be done.


Doc Bok said...

Take THAT. Tree-assed bastard.
Is this verse from the Coptic scrolls?

Doc Bok said...

I'm beginning to understand religion. Who wouldn't want super powers? I think I want to be in the religion that gives you x-ray vision. For obvious reasons.

OneEar said...

When I was a kid, I fell out of a tree once. I begged Jesus to smite that motherfucker, but I don't think that he ever did. It's like I've always said, trees are just weeds with an attitude.

Doc Bok said...

There is clearly a noticeable lack of smiting these days, going as far back as when we were kids. Times are a-changin'. Clearly Jesus is on a smoke-break.

(if you don't believe me, here is a simple fact, and we all know that facts are facts. That has been well established:
There are more trees in North America than there were in the 1920's. Sleepy Jesus? I think yes.)