RUE Seeks Measly $1,000,000,000.00 Bailout

Rusty Enterprises Co. Inc. Ltd., a very, very limited liability company (RUE), announced yesterday that it needs a mere $1Billion US to meet its current financial obligations. RUE Chief Chief Chief OneEar urged law-makers to put partisanship aside in order to stabilize RUE's shaky financial situation.

"This is shaping up to be MOAB, the Mother of All Bank Runs," noted Ear. "Unless the people want a severe melt-down, the Congress needs to get off its Duff and send me $1Billion."

Ear resisted providing details on how he would spend the $1Billion. "Treasury Czar Paulson is seeking $700Billion. Why don't you worry about him and leave us alone?" queried Ear. "All we need is 1 little billion dollars."

Ear left open the possibility that he may be back in the future asking Congress for additional funds. "This crisis has traveled from Wall Street to Main Street. I just want to make sure that it travels down My Street."