Friday, August 21, 2009

Financial Bailout? well, at least we did "something".

To Whom it May Concern:

Earlier this evening, I canceled my credit card account with Chase secondary to outrageous disregard for customer satisfaction. When I contacted your customer service department, both the representative I spoke with, Richard Blazer, and his manager, paid no attention at all to my concerns of basic unprovoked abuse on the part of Chase (no wonder our country is in such miserable shape when the entire banking industry, with Chase out in front, is a conglomeration of professional thieves and liars who suck the life-blood out of the very hands that feed them--customers). Each of them was happy to cancel an account that I have had for years, though initially through Washington Mutual, rather than answer why my credit line was arbitrarily reduced--which hurts my overall credit score--despite the fact that I have never missed a payment or paid late, AND I actually have a credit balance of $464 THAT CHASE OWES ME. This sort of conduct will soon be illegal, as you know, because it is outrageously unethical. I guess you have so much of my fucking tax-dollar bailout money that you don't need my business anymore.

You disgust me. I have written to my Congressman about this incident, and I have reported Chase to the Better Business Bureau. You probably don't care, again, because you have so much of my tax money that you probably couldn't care less about your customers. I thought financial times were tight--but I guess not for Chase; you have money to burn. Thanks to people like me. You are welcome.

I am really not sure how the people working at your company are able to sleep at night, knowing what the company policies are. Just think: On your deathbed, after a career at a company like Chase, what will you have left behind? Teachers, doctors, judges change other lives for the better--whereas you will have nothing to show for your life's work but an accumulated bunch of fellow human beings who are absolutely irate and disgusted by you and your company.

Bravo. Way to steal, and get away with it legally. You must all be so proud of your work. I'm sure your parents are proud of you, and all the good you have brought in to the world, too.


Half Goat-man, Half PMSing Little Bitch, Half Jack-ass, Half big, fat, time-waster. Half total dumb-ass for thinking anyone actually cares.


Doc Bok said...

Dear A. Joshi,

If I don't have my check tomorrow, I am turning the case over to a collection agency. Chase has already been assessed a 25% fee, calculated daily, for the time it has been hording my money against my express request.

The new total that Chase owes is $567.68. I am very sorry for any inconvenience this causes, and hope you realize that I, like you, have no choice but to implement these daily assessments and will hand the whole thing over to a collection agency.

If I do not receive the total, which today is $567.68, within 90 days, I will file a suit in Los Angeles Small Claims Court, which is a part of the Los Angeles Superior Court. Please keep in mind, for every day that the payment is not received, an additional 25% interest rate will be assessed.

Like you, I understand that you'd be concerned. I am truly sorry if this notice has not met your expectations.

It has been my pleasure to assist you in this matter.

Thank you,

Half Goat-man, Half Jackass, Half half-and-half

Litzi said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Alceste said...

Doc-Don't you still owe me $4.85 from mama mias in 1989? Nice letter, idiot.

Doc Bok said...

Touche, Alceste, touche

Doc Bok said...

and you are confusing me with Landrew Colyp: Chief loan holder at Banco de Al in as far as the $4.85 from Mama Mia's is concerned.

Doc Bok said...

I'm hungry. I think I'll go get something to eat. Sushi at Mammaries.