People Are Strange

I've written many songs over the years. Clever, heartfelt, sappy, edgy - I've done them all. I've hit the rugby song genre, I've appealed to pedophiles, I've appealed to camel toes and UFOs - but do you know what remains my most popular song?

County G

Let me tell you of a river,
It runs slow and small but free.
The easy way to get there
Is to take old County G.

Bring along your fishing gear
Head down Mount Vernon Creek
You'll prob'ly need your wading boots
Cuz the stories, they get deep.

Pull up a stool my friend
Come and watch the waves with me
As life goes drifting by
Past the shores of
County G.

For as long as I've been living
On the shores of County G.
I've never been surprised by the
Surprising things I see.

I've seen em riding horses and
I've seen em walking goats.
I've seen em pulling tugofwar
To raise Rick Skindrud's votes.
I've seen the shoreline gleaming bright
Reflections from the sun.
The shining chrome from 50 bikes
Out on a poker run.
I've seen all kinds of festivals
I've seen weddings wakes and feasts,
Arm-rassling, tractor pulls and
Parades that last for weeks.

Pull up a stool my friend
Come and watch the waves with me
As life goes drifting by
Past the shores of
County G.

I've seen em spin a thousand miles
Of otherwise Goodyear.
I've seen em leave old Wally's head
With a stripe from ear to ear.
I've seen a friedly Euchre match
evolve into push and shove
I've seen em leave from down below
and drive to up above.
I've seen em fight like tomcats
When a pussy is in heat.
I've seen em out there yodeling
while staggering down the street.
I've seen em tracking buffalo
they say its harder than you think,
by now I've seen it all
Since Rufus bought a drink.

Pull up a stool my friend
Come and watch the waves with me
As life goes drifting by
past the shores of
County G.

I've seen a wedding band perform
made up of the bride and groom
You'll have that yes you will
You betchas around the room
I've been the jury in Judge Jeannie's court
Where justice is disposed
If you happen to be there on the odd occasion
When Jeannie isn't closed.

Pull up a stool my friend
Come and watch the waves with me
As life goes drifting by
past the shores of
County G.
I think I may have seen it all
Or all I want to see
As life goes drifting by
Past the shores of
County G.