I have another one of my patented "Great Ideas" (TM). I will file an application with the US Copyright Office to copyright the pattern of the brainwaves generated by REM sleep. Then, anyone who dreams will be infringing upon my copyright and will owe me royalties and attorney fees.
It is my understanding that all animals superior in the chain of command to the duck-billed platypus require REM sleep, so this simple copyright filing should make me the supreme ruler of all mammals. (I can't recall whether the platypus will or will not be under my dominion, so that might present an opportunity for someone out there). If it turns out that there actually is a God, all available evidence indicates that he/she/transgender would require REM sleep and will therefore be under my control as well.
Finally I am getting somewhere.
The only official site of The First Unification Church of Kooking (fka the First Unification Church of Knowledge)(aka 1st Unichurck) and its house band, the Clown Squad (Affiliated with the community service organization The Underminers' Society of America). --THIS BLOG IS FOR RELIGIOUS, SCIENTIFIC AND EDUCATIONAL PURPOSES ONLY--(Not tested on animals)
3 comments:
I'm glad to see you're finally thinking on a larger and more appropriate scale.
Hi OneEar,
Your “Great Ideas™” for copyrighting the pattern of the brainwaves generated by REM sleep is certainly an ingenious endeavor. However, you may have caused an uprising of the duck-billed platypuses by inferring that they’re mentally inferior to other species on the planet. Twilight Zone
Thanks for throwing the rest of us a bone with the platypus "opportunity" as you put it. Such a giver.
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